Most of you are going to hate on me after this post. I have realised that sex has always been a taboo of sorts in Uganda. There's a lot of campaigns about HIV/AIDS and all that but no one really talks about sex (the exception being the red rug of course but one wouldn't even call that a reliable source seeing as most of their articles are unashamedly ripped off the Internet.)
Why? You ask am I delving into such a dirty shameful topic (see, you even think it's dirty!) Well, as I was talking with a couple of girlfriends recently, one confessed to having painful sex. And when she said this, 2 other girls said they were going through the same thing. I was agape in shock. So I asked, how long has this being going on? They said forever, ever since they had started having sex. Have you told your respective partners about this? No, they all said. Jesus, I.WAS.IN.SHOCK! Why in the world would you undress and have sex with someone but still be unable to talk to this same person about it.Why,why,why?
By the way all these three women have been to the best of schools, come from relatively upper middle class families and watch E! So you can imagine my shock. So I ask them if any of them have talked to anyone prior to this about this problem. Again, same answer no. Lord have mercy on me..I wanted to get up and smack them till they woke up and joined me in the year 2010!
Since then I have been wondering, why do we as a people(Ugandans) have this attitude towards sex? Is it our culture, is it religion? Am reading about that...shall surely get back to you on that.
As for my friends with the painful sex. I have 3 pieces of advice. Firstly, go see a gynaecologist( I DO NOT MEAN A GENERAL DOCTOR HERE) and if he finds that all is OK,talk to your man. Dude might be pumping away with all his might interpreting your screams of pain as those of pleasure yet poor girl you're dying beneath him. Lastly and most importantly, find out what works for you...and yes I mean find some me time and touch yourself...no your not going to hell! It will do you a world of good. You'll thank me later.
On that note, am looking into buying a rabbit!(I.AM.NOT.ASHAMED) I don't know where I can find one here though and all my friends abroad are too cowardly to walk into a sex shop(see what am saying, they took the attitude [read maalo] with them to outside countries!) So if one of you dolls can be so kind as to point me in the right direction, I will be grateful.